trauma | The Beautiful Kingdom Warriors

Over the past few years with #churchtoo disclosures and allegations, as well as the tidal wave of prominent pastors’ “deeds of darkness” being exposed, it is clear that the evangelical church has an abuse problem. Perhaps even more tragically, when we respond poorly to abuse, we exacerbate the pain and trauma of the victims and enable the perpetrators, endangering others and harming the witness of the church. It is imperative that we learn how to respond in a way that ministers to victims, holds perpetrators accountable, and creates a safe, healthy environment for our faith communities.

I wanted to make this post as a resource for pastors, lay leaders, and abuse survivors to facilitate abuse education. For each of us, it is not a matter of if we will face abuse in our own community, but when. So I asked The Beautiful Kingdom Warrior Facebook community to help me compile a list of abuse advocates in this comment thread. Below, I have fleshed out our list with links to the advocates’ websites, books, and social media so that you can easily follow them and begin to learn more about the prevalence and dynamics of abuse. Be sure to pass this post along.

To begin, here is a link to a short article I wrote on the dynamics of abuse for my denomination’s digital magazine, and here are some useful images for familiarization with the dynamics of abuse:

Abuse Advocates and Experts (in alphabetical order):

*book links are to my Amazon Affiliate store: thebeautif017-20

Dr. Dan Allender – The Allender Center

Bio: Prominent Christian therapist, author, professor, and speaker focusing on sexual abuse and trauma recovery
Website: www.theallendercenter.org
Book: The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Vimeo

Shahida Arabi – Self-Care Haven

Bio: Columbia U grad who studied bullying; best-selling author specializing in narcissism and self-care
Website: shahidaarabi.com, Self-Care Haven blog
Books: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare; POWER: Surviving and Thriving after Narcissistic Abuse
Social Media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter

Lundy Bancroft

Bio: 25 years experience in the fields of abuse, trauma and recovery; counseling, workshops and public speaking
Website: lundybancroft.com
Books: Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men; Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Social media: Facebook

Laura Barringer

Bio: Educator, Advocate and Co-Author of A Church Called Tov
Website: linktr.ee/laurabarringer
Book: A Church Called Tov: Forming a Goodness Culture That Resists Abuses of Power and Promotes Healing
Social media: Instagram, Twitter

Andrew J. Bauman

Bio: Christian Author, Therapist, & Abuse Advocate. Helping men become sexually healthy.
Website: andrewjbauman.com
Books: The Sexually Healthy Man, The Psychology of Porn, Stumbling Toward Wholeness
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Podcast

Gretchen Baskerville – Life Saving Divorce

Bio: Christian Divorce Recovery Minister, Author and Abuse Advocate
Website: lifesavingdivorce.com
Book: The Life Saving Divorce: Hope for People Leaving Destructive Relationships
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Vimeo

Nichole Braddock Bromley – One Voice

Bio: Author, International Speaker, Sexual Abuse Survivor, and Activist
Website: iamonevoice.com
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Podcast

Jeff Crippen – Unholy Charade

Bio: Pastor, Author and Abuse Advocate
Website: unholycharade.com
Books: A Cry for Justice; Unholy Charade
Social media: Twitter, Sermon Audio: 21 sermons on abuse

Chuck DeGroat

Bio: Professor of Pastoral Care and Christian Spirituality at Western Seminary; Therapist; Author
Website: www.chuckdegroat.net
Book: When Narcissism Comes to Church: Healing Your Community from Emotional and Spiritual Abuse
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram

Rachael Denhollander

Bio: Lawyer, first accuser of Larry Nassar; Abuse Advocate and Consultant
Website: rachaeldenhollander.com
Book: What is a Girl Worth?; How Much is a Little Girl Worth?
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

F. Remy Diederich

Bio: Pastor, Author – helps people overcome life’s hurts with God’s help
Website: readingremy.com
Books: Broken Trust, Healing the Hurts of Your Past
Social media: Facebook

Patrick Doyle

Bio: Abuse survivor, Coach for those affected by emotional abuse, Speaker
Website: patrickdoyle.life
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, YouTube

Ashley Easter – Courage 365

Bio: Founder of Courage 365, a catalyst to cultivate and empower a Justice Generation that resists abuse everywhere
Website: courage365.org
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube

Bob & Helga Edwards

Bio: Christian Therapists and Public Speakers
Website: awakedeborah.com
Book: Addressing Domestic Violence in the Church
Social media: Facebook

Maureen Farrell Garcia

Bio: Christian Writer, Speaker, Instructor, and Abuse Victim-Survivor Advocate
Website: maureenfgarcia.com
Social media: Twitter

Give Her Wings

Mission: We serve, without judgment and with compassion, single mothers who have left abusive relationships. Our goal is to show them the community and body of the Church, when they otherwise are not finding it.
Website: giveherwings.com
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

GRACE – Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment

Mission: Empowering Christian communities to recognize, prevent, and respond to abuse. Founded in 2004.

“With a combined experience of over 100 years of addressing abuse-related issues, GRACE has accumulated and organized a wealth of resources from mental health experts, former prosecutors, and theologians to give you and your organization a well-rounded, robust, and deep understanding of abuse and how to prevent it. We all can make a difference by learning about abuse, become equipped on how to recognize it, and committing to responding appropriately. Browse the categories below to learn more.”

Website: netgrace.org
Social media: Facebook, YouTube; founder Boz Tchividjian on Twitter

Natalie Hoffman – Flying Free Sisterhood

Bio: Author, Podcaster and Life Coach for women recovering from abusive marriages and churches
Website: flyingfreenow.com
Book: Is it me? Making sense of your confusing marriage
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Podcast

Kyle J. Howard

Bio: Christian Theologian, preacher, & trauma informed soul care provider; Survivor of racial and spiritual abuse
Website: kylejhoward.com
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

Mariam Ibraheem – Tahrir Alnisa Foundation

Bio: Survivor of Sudanese Prison and Domestic Violence; Director of Global Mobilization and Co-Founder of TAF
Website: tahriralnisa.org
Mission: “We empower women escaping abuse by assisting with housing, medical care, trauma recovery, and legal fees.”
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube

Virginia Knowles

Bio: Practical Theologian researching authoritarian and/or aberrant religious movements, spiritual abuse and family dysfunction
Website: virginiaknowles.com
Forthcoming book: Burned: Rising from the ashes of spiritual crisis

Dr. Diane Langberg

Bio: Christian Psychologist with 50 years experience counseling trauma survivors; Speaker, Consultant, Author
Website: dianelangberg.com
Books: Suffering and the Heart of God, Redeeming Power: Understanding Authority and Abuse in the Church
Social media: Twitter

This video is an excellent discussion about Ravi Zacharias’ decades long deceit and abuse and the system that enabled him:

Bekah Legg – Restored

Bio: Director of Restored, “Working alongside churches to end violence against women”
Website: restored-uk.org, bekahlegg.com
Social media: Restored’s Facebook, Twitter, YouTube; Bekah’s Twitter

Sarah McDugal

Bio: Empowering women to recover from abuse in the faith community. Coaching + Courses + Groups
Website: wildernesstowild.com
Books: Safe Churches: Responding to Abuse in the Faith Community; Myths We Believe, Predators We Trust
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, YouTube

Scot McKnight

Bio: Professor at Northern Seminary, Theology Blogger, Co-Author of A Church Called Tov
Website: Jesus Creed
Book: A Church Called Tov: Forming a Goodness Culture that Resists Abuse and Promotes Healing
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

Chris Moles – PeaceWorks University

Bio: Pastor, Speaker, Biblical Counselor addressing domestic violence
Website: chrismoles.com
Book: The Heart of Domestic Abuse: Gospel Solutions for Men Who Use Control and Violence in the Home
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, The Safest Place: Domestic Abuse and the Church FB group

Wade Mullen

Bio: M.Div Program Director at Capital Seminary & Graduate School, Author, Abuse Advocate
Website: wadetmullen.com
Book: Something’s Not Right: Decoding the Hidden Tactics of Abuse and Freeing Yourself from Its Power
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

Julie Owens

Bio: Expert Consultant, Trainer and Keynote Speaker on violence against women and trauma
Website: domesticviolenceexpert.org
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

Naghmeh Abedini Panahi – Tahrir Alnisa Foundation

Bio: Iranian Church Planter and Domestic Violence Survivor; Executive Director and Co-Founder of TAF
Website: tahriralnisa.org
Mission: “We empower women escaping abuse by assisting with housing, medical care, trauma recovery, and legal fees.”
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube

Brian Peck – Room to Thrive

Bio: Licensed Therapist, Trauma Coach, helping people resolve religious trauma and thrive after deconstruction
Website: roomtothrive.com
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube

Sarah K. Ramsey – Toxic Person Proof

Bio: Toxic Relationship Specialist, Author, Podcaster, Consultant
Website: sarahkramsey.com
Book: Becoming Toxic Person Proof
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Podcast

Dr. Anna Salter

Bio: Training, Consulting and Publications on Sex Abuse, Offenders, and Victimization
Website: annasalter.com
Book: Predators, Pedophiles, Rapists and Other Sex Offenders
Documentary: Predators

Dr. Christy Gunter Sim

Bio: Expert Training, Advising and Consulting on Domestic Violence, Sexual Assault, and Trauma Healing
Website: drchristysim.com
Book: Survivor Care: What Religious Professionals Need to Know about Healing Trauma
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram

Eric Skwarczynski – Preacher Boys

Bio: A podcast and upcoming documentary shedding light on decades of abuse within the Independent Fundamental Baptist movement
Website: preacherboysdoc.com
Social media: Facebook, Twitter (Preacher Boys), Twitter (Eric), Instagram, YouTube, Podcast

Julie Anne Smith – Spiritual Sounding Board

Bio: Blogger, Abuse Advocate and Survivor; “Out of our wounds flow compassion, understanding, & grace. May we all be ‘wounded healers’ who do no harm.“
Website: spiritualsoundingboard.com
Social media: Facebook, Twitter

Shanell T. Smith

Bio: Minister, Professor, Consultant, Author, Survivor
Website: shanelltsmithconsulting.com
Book: Touched: For Survivors of Sexual Assault Like Me Who Have Been Hurt by Church Fol…
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube

Elaine Storkey

Bio: Writer, Broadcaster, Speaker, Author, Christian Feminist
Website: elainestorkey.com
Book: Scars Across Humanity: Understanding and Overcoming Violence Against Women
Social media: Twitter

Darby Strickland

Bio: Biblical Counselor, Speaker and Author
Website: darbystrickland.com
Book: Is it Abuse? A Biblical Guide to identifying domestic abuse and helping victims
Social media: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter

The Hope of Survivors

Mission: A non-profit dedicated to assisting victims of clergy sexual abuse and misconduct
Website: thehopeofsurvivors.org
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, YouTube

Shannon Thomas

Bio: Trauma Therapist, Author
Website: shannonthomas.com
Book: Healing from Hidden Abuse , Exposing Financial Abuse
Social media: Facebook, Instagram

Lori Anne Thompson

Bio: Registered Kinesiologist and expertise in the protection of people from the ravages of poverty, adverse childhood experience, and interpersonal violence. Survivor of Ravi Zacharias abuse.
Website: loriannethompson.com
Social media: Twitter

This interview is a must see. Lori Anne articulates the dynamics of abuse so profoundly and carefully with great expertise.

Dr. Ruth Tucker

Bio: Former Professor at Calvin Theological Seminary, Author
Website: ruthtucker.com
Book: Black and White Bible, Black and Blue Wife

Tom Vermillion

Bio: Pastor, Author
Website: tomvermillion.com
Book: Born To Be Free: Discovering Christ’s Power to Set You Free from a Painful Past
Social media: Twitter

Leslie Vernick

Bio: Speaker, Author, and Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Relationship Coach
Website: leslievernick.com
Books: The Emotionally Destructive Marriage
Social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube

Who would you add? Let me know in the comments! Please share this important information!

*I am an Amazon Affiliate and may receive a percentage from books sales from the links above.

When I was a student at Gordon College, I attended church in Beverly Farms, near another liberal arts institution, Endicott College. A beautiful, artistic, Brazilian poet from Endicott also attended church there and we hit it off like Anne-and-Diana-style Kindred Spirits. I remember horsing around with Jana at church retreats and attending poetry readings, musical performances, and more together. When she graduated, I got to meet her family from Brazil and celebrate her milestone with an American Idol themed Karaoke party. I promise to come back and insert a picture of the two of us when I am able to locate my college album!

As we moved on in life, we stayed in touch occasionally through email, and then two years ago my globe-trotting friend was back in New England and made a special visit up to Maine. While she was here, she received her acceptance to her Ph.D. program in Neuroscience at the University of Sydney, and she also had a promising Skype meeting about a non-profit she had begun in Liberia called Second Chance Africa. It was an honor to share these mountain-top moments with her!

Years ago, Jana had embarked on a back-packing adventure that brought her through Africa and face-to-face with lives torn apart by the trauma of war. She was moved with compassion, so she stayed in a refugee camp and helped, and recognized that little was being done to address trauma. She began Second Chance Africa in 2008 and has operated on a shoe-string budget through crowd-sourcing, offering therapy to over 7,000. And now she has developed an innovative therapy app that will extend her life-changing therapy groups to thousands and hopefully millions in the near future. Jana is calling this the Sankofa Project, after the sankofa bird that walks forward while looking back over its shoulder, representing the importance of reflecting on the past in order to move ahead into the future.

Watch this short video for a quick description of the Sankofa Project:

I’ve had the great honor of joining the Second Chance Africa board as the Secretary and state-side rep to assist with banking needs and receive mailings. Last week, I met Jana at the airport and we accomplished tasks big and small (banking, printing, laundry, etc.) in a matter of hours before she flew to Liberia to launch her app with trauma therapy groups. She is relying on crowd-funding once again to make this project successful. Donations can be made here. This is an opportunity where even a small donation can make a big impact, and I assure you that Jana and her team are motivated by tremendous love and a desire to change lives. Please share their mission with your friends and family!

Jana providing therapy to refugees in Liberia.

On her website, there are moving testimonials from people who have already been treated through Jana’s organization, Second Chance Africa. Here are just a few:

“I really wanted to write you in the second week that you left, but I really wanted to see if the transformation that took place my life was something real or magical. I am convinced that it was something real that took place in my life. I want to be grateful to God who directed you in Ghana to the Liberian Refugee. I am grateful that I ever met you. There’s no more nightmares, bad dreams running every night for safety. I can see myself as somebody still useful in life. I believed that there is hope for the future me. I know that with your traumatic therapy treatment you can heal anybody who have been living with trauma for twenty to fifty years. I am saying this because of what took place in my life. I have been living with trauma for the past sixteen years and for you to make me overcome my trauma in less than a month it is something I can’t still believe. However, I am bit sad because there are many Liberians who are going back home still traumatized. UNHCR have been doing well for REFUGEE all over the world but we need more trauma counselors to help these people going back home. Many Liberians do not want to go back home but they do not have any choice. For now there is no more resettlement program for Liberians refugee by UNHCR, therefore they have go back home. It is my prayer that you will be able to get help from other people”. – S.G.

“While at the Monrovia Central Prison, an organization by the name of Second Chance visited the prison and we were helped by the means of their training, such as exercises, counseling and lectures. I personally benefited, there were exercises we were introduced to that when you are down or depressed, it helped you lift your spirit. It helped me many days to relax and have a good night rest despite my problems at the prison. It made me at times to even think that there was a second chance in my life. And I will like to encourage them to keep up the good works, because it made people feel important, that whatever problems in their lives is not the end of their lives. May the good God bless their effort and keep them strong”. M.R.

“She guided through the trauma healing and from that healing today I am able to recover, I came to myself, I came to my senses. I really feel good that now I am a human being, and I am safe, I feel fine in my body” – F.D.

sankofa bono

To Jana’s great delight, her friend Bono has been wearing a yellow Sankofa Project bracelet and plugging Jana’s work on U2’s 2017 Joshua Tree Tour! Here is a picture of him wearing the yellow Sankofa Project bracelet. When it is available, I will update with a link to purchase your own. For only $10, you will receive a pack of 10 bracelets and sponsor a full trauma relief program in a post-war region in Africa, for a group of 10 participants during our field implementation phase in 2017-2018.

To read more about Jana’s work through Second Chance Africa and The Sankofa Project, please visit http://secondchanceafrica.org/sankofa/. And again, please consider giving to her work here and sharing this project with your friends and family. Thank you!

P.S. In addition to her amazing, loving work for trauma victims, my friend is also a brilliant artist. Check out this painting she showed in a RAW Sydney exhibit last year! sankofa art In the RAW Sydney post describing her art, they said,

Jana’s work arises from the need to give a voice to her thoughts and ideas that may speak louder through silent speech. Her paintings are not meant to be pleasant to the eye nor serve as a decor piece. Her colours are bold and aggressive. Her aim is to create discomfort and challenge one’s misconceptions about themselves and the world. She is a self-taught artist, and a PhD student specialising in post-traumatic stress. The stories she has heard and the violence she has seen while traveling, working and living in war impacted countries in the Middle East, Africa and Asia deeply affects her artwork imagery and aesthetics of advocacy.